The Buffoon and The Dean Of Admissions Lyrics

"And now a buffoon's meeting with the dean of admissions at a
prestigious college."
Dean: "Well Michael, I would like to extend my warmest congradulations
on your upcoming graduation and I understand you are interested in
matriculating here in the fall."
Buffoon: "I got a snake, man!"
Dean: "Yes, pets are welcome here on campus. Be it the traditional dog,
or cat, or even the occasional reptile."
Buffoon: "One time I fed it some beer man! It was slithering this way
and that! It was all f**ked up!"
Dean: "I'm sure it was. Well we discourage inappropriate drinking among
both students and pets here on campus."
Buffoon: "f**kin' Shit!"
Dean: "Yes, that's a not uncommon reaction to this policy. So tell me a
little bit more about your background."
Buffoon: "My father's a f**king a*shole, man!"
Dean: "Hmm, I see. Your feelings of rebelion are not unusual at your age
son."
Buffoon: "My mother's a piece of shit too!"
Dean: "Well, I hope you can find an outlet for your hostility over the
summer so you can come to school in the fall relaxed and ready to
learn."
Buffoon: "My teacher in high school was a stupid bitch, man! She had her
head way up her a*s!"
Dean: "Well the quality of the faculty at a University such as ours far
exceeds that of a local public high school."
Buffoon: "Your secretary's a real fat bitch, man!"
Dean: "Yes, she's tried many diets over the years with minimal success."
Buffoon: "I had diarhea last month. I had to shit all f**king day!"
Dean: "Uh huh, Well we all get the occasional stomach bug, never a
pleasurable experience. So have you given any thought to your choice of
major?"
Buffoon: "I've got a big f**king boner right now."
Dean: "I see. Well s*xual arrousal is not uncommon during periods of
nervous tension. I do not take offense."
Buffoon: "One time I ate my neighbors shit!"
Dean: "That's understandable. Well, I enjoyed meeting you. We'll be
sending you our decision by the end of the month."
Buffoon: "I bet you got really hairy balls."
Dean: "Yes, it's a veritable forest down there. Bye bye."

Adam Sandler - They're All Gonna Laugh at You

Sep 1993

1. Assistant Principal's Big Day
2. The Buffoon and The Dean Of Admissions
3. Buddy
4. The Longest Pee
5. Food Innuendo Guy
6. The Beating Of A High School Janitor
7. Right Field
8. The Buffoon and The Valedictorian
9. Mr. Spindel's Phone Call
10. The Thanksgiving Song
11. The Beating Of A High School Bus Driver
12. Oh Mom...
13. Fatty McGee
14. At A Medium Pace
15. The Beating Of A High School Science Teacher
16. The Cheerleader
17. I'm So Wasted
18. Lunchlady Land
19. The Beating Of A High School Spanish Teacher
20. Toll Booth Willie
21. Teenage Love On The Phone
22. My Little Chicken